Safety Bully!

In my previous post about corporate safety monkeys, I rail against the moronic mindset of large corporations that use the supposition that if a person gets injured performing a task, then that task or the tools he was using to perform that task must be inherently evil and therefore requires a a rule banning said task or said tools. At this rate, in another 20 years we will all be lying down on our backs 24/7, too scared to roll over in order to prevent bed sores for fear of straining muscles. Hmmm, but what if I could harness that power and use it for good? Well, at least for MY good...

In a similar experience I had with a large energy corporation (Con-Edison) I realized that I needed a good deal of room in order to unload a semi, and then load the roof with the crane. I suggested that we close the parking lot in order to do so. I was told very bluntly: "No way are we closing this parking lot for your convenience." I just threw out sort of half-heartedly that it "might just be a little safer?" and THEN stuff started to happen, by golly!! Seriously, 20 minutes later the parking lot was completely empty, they had gone around all over the campus and found the owners of each car, and got them to move them. AHAHAHAHHAHA!!! Feel the Power!!! FEEL the SAFETY!!!!!

All because I mentioned the "S" word; if something went wrong, they would fear liability. Well anyway, enough about safety and stupidity, I'll try to find something funny to write about. Maybe I will fall into a big vat of poop or something. That would be amusing, right?